Procrastination as an Art Form

It’s been 23 days since the band’s last gig.  Today will be our first post-gig rehearsal.  We picked a few songs to work on.  Have I learned them?  Nope.  Not yet.  Even better, have I taken my guitar out of it’s case?  Nope.  Not yet.  Even betterer, have I touched any of the gear that I took to the 4/1 show since unloading it all into the garage that night?  Nope. Not yet.

I had a plan to re-arrange my pedal board to put the focus onto overdrive instead of fuzz. The green Muff pedal is coming off, a Tube Screamer is going on, the main source of dirt will be the OCD.  A good plan.  Have I done anything to implement it and test it out and see how I like it?  Nope.  Not yet.  Sigh of frustration.  I will leave the board at home today and just take my OCD clone and a tuner.  Then I have to make myself do the work I have been putting off for the last three weeks before next week’s practice.

You see, folks, there are people who are masters at procrastination.  They see themselves as skilled above all others.  Then they see me in (in)action and they realize that there is another gear.  Another level of procrastinationness.  I alone have reached that level.  I alone have elevated procrastination to an art form.  I am the king.  I am the lord and master of all put-offedness.  Kneel before my mad skills.


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